In that moment, I swear we were infinite

I thought it was about time I blogged again well mostly I felt like writing a diary entry so I figured I should blog it. My life is full of goodbyes (or see ya laters) which never appear to get easier and even though I get one more day with one of my best friends (he's from the states here on holidays) when he returns from the coast before his flight back home part of me already knows he is gone, two years of separation we have remained friends and I don't doubt we will keep it up again but it doesn't hurt any less that is for sure.

Anyway I thought I would share with you the mix tape tracks I put together for him, some sentimental, some make me happy, some are rediculous, some he had recomended me and some I had recomended him. All in all one of the best moments and one of my happiest in awhile was hanging out at one of my friends places and there was four of us, my American bffl included and we sung along to most of the songs, I can't sing at all but it was the best feeling sharing those songs and those lyrics. I guess you just had to be there.


1. Crooked Teeth - Death Cab For Cutie
2. Caring is Creepy - The Shins
3. Postcard - An Horse
4. In the Aeroplane over the Sea - Neutral Milk Hotel
5. Wagon Wheel - Old Crow Medicine Show
6. Fake Plastic Trees - Radiohead
7. Our Own Way - Sparkadia
8. Your Ex-Lover is Dead - Stars
9. Seize the Day - Wax Tailor
10. Hear me out - Frou Frou
11. Bittersweet Symphony - (cover) Coldplay ft Richard Ashcroft
12. Dance, dance, dance - Lykke Li
13. What am I supposed to be doing? - The Bedroom Philosopher
14. Strange Overtones - David Byrne & Brian Eno
15. It's A Fact (Printed Stained) - Matt & Kim
16. Flippers - Art vs Science
17. Walking on a Dream - Empire of the Sun
18. Breathe - Telepopmusik
19. I'm so postmodern - The Bedroom Philosopher
20. Ever fallen in love (with someone you shouldn't've) - Buzzcocks
21. Everybody's got the same insecurities as you - The Bedroom Philosopher
22. Why can't I be you? - The Cure
23. Blue Orchid - The White Stripes
24. Music is my hot, hot sex - CSS
25. Everything that happens - David Byrne & Brian Eno
26. The district sleeps alone tonight - The Postal Service
27. World Spins Madly On - The Weepies
28. Life is long - David Byrne & Brian Eno
29. The Heart Song - The Bedroom Philosopher
30. Just a boy - Angus & Julia Stone
31. A Lack of Colour - Death Cab for Cutie


okay so very long list and it fills two tapes but they all deserve their place there.
so I hope you enjoy them as much as I do should you ever listen to them.
my inital quote I borrowed from the novel said American friend brought me here called The Perks of Being a Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky and I'd like to think that how Charlie felt in that moment was much like the moment I shared with my friends singing along to those songs...
"In that moment, I swear we were infinite"
That we were.



until next time,
much love xoxo

A home I should probably aknowledge for who I am

I always call Sydney my home despite not being born there and I always say I grew up there because in theory I did between the ages of 3-13 (almost 14). But then I think about the growing up I have done or at the very least getting older & my life experience. But when I think back most of this has been in the last 3 & 1/2 years that I have spent in Brisbane (since the beginning of '06. The year I spent in Newport - '05 was the biggest waste and probably the worst year even though I did meet some great people).

In the last three years I have gone through more emotions and identity sculpting situations than the rest of my life. I've met these amazing people that have opened my world to all these amazing things - different places, cultures (food, yum!), different art forms be they fine or performing arts. Of course there were the typical experiences associated with youths - parties, relationship - problems predominately, independence, exploring, experimenting with an array of contexts, sharing love with peers, so on and so forth.

But finally I am finding my niche. In this city I love to loathe. I am finding my niche. I am finding it in Brisbane. Go figure.

until next time,
much love xoxo

I wonder if I'd get along with them...

You know what I mean, those friends you make when you are in a tad of a state, I question if I'd befriend them if I was my typical self.
Thursday was yet another one of those occasions where I probably should think before I act. Before I knew it I was telling my life story to a young fellow (happened to be the guy my good friend c***blocked to try get an in with TMBGITW). So there I was spewing my life story to this poor young fellow about everything from going out, a recent party, recent male problems, sport, my favourite English club, marriage; it is quite possible I covered a good chunk of my life in a not so conscious state. The lovely thing was he was quite happy to chat back, look after me/make sure I didn't get hit by a bus and he didn't run a mile when he had to listen to the story of my life. I don't know about you but I think this one is a keeper.

Until next time,
much love
xoxo

borrowed topics

Okay so really I stole this from ash BUT I thought it was rather brilliant and something I like to do occasionally that is arranging books so their titles make flow on sentences and other such. Anyway! I thought I'd share one with you (particularly as Alice is nagging me to blog!). So yes, enjoy!

Until next time,
much love
xoxo

wonderful friends make up for shite feelings.

males have a tendency to be problematic in my life, lately this has been no exception. Last night I was particularly down but these wonderful people picked me right back up on my feet.

WF1
"Honestly, he's all kinds of fucked up,"
"I'd prefer not to see you unhappy"

WF2
dropped by my work today with a box of chocolates and when I finished I found the best text,
"Just thought I'd say I hope you're feeling better than last night. Honestly you're fabulous and don't deserve to be unhappy! xo"


I know one of them reads this blog occasionally and the other doesn't but I thought they both deserved a rant on how much I appreciate them both. So I made a little I love you more than blank. Thanks guys for being genuinely fantastic.

Until next time,
much love
xoxo

Tradition.

This is a story for only those who were there could understand.

A favourite scene

I don't have to tell you things are bad. Everybody knows things are bad. It's a depression. Everybody's out of work or scared of losing their job. The dollar buys a nickel's work, banks are going bust, shopkeepers keep a gun under the counter. Punks are running wild in the street and there's nobody anywhere who seems to know what to do, and there's no end to it. We know the air is unfit to breathe and our food is unfit to eat, and we sit watching our TV's while some local newscaster tells us that today we had fifteen homicides and sixty-three violent crimes, as if that's the way it's supposed to be. We know things are bad - worse than bad. They're crazy. It's like everything everywhere is going crazy, so we don't go out anymore. We sit in the house, and slowly the world we are living in is getting smaller, and all we say is, 'Please, at least leave us alone in our living rooms. Let me have my toaster and my TV and my steel-belted radials and I won't say anything. Just leave us alone.' Well, I'm not gonna leave you alone. I want you to get mad! I don't want you to protest. I don't want you to riot - I don't want you to write to your congressman because I wouldn't know what to tell you to write. I don't know what to do about the depression and the inflation and the Russians and the crime in the street. All I know is that first you've got to get mad. You've got to say, 'I'm a HUMAN BEING, Goddamnit! My life has VALUE!' So I want you to get up now. I want all of you to get up out of your chairs. I want you to get up right now and go to the window. Open it, and stick your head out, and yell, 'I'M AS MAD AS HELL, AND I'M NOT GOING TO TAKE THIS ANYMORE!' I want you to get up right now, sit up, go to your windows, open them and stick your head out and yell - 'I'm as mad as hell and I'm not going to take this anymore!' Things have got to change. But first, you've gotta get mad!... You've got to say, 'I'm as mad as hell, and I'm not going to take this anymore!' Then we'll figure out what to do about the depression and the inflation and the oil crisis. But first get up out of your chairs, open the window, stick your head out, and yell, and say it: "I'M AS MAD AS HELL, AND I'M NOT GOING TO TAKE THIS ANYMORE!"

Howard Beale - Network - 1976

Until next time,
much love
xoxo